|
YO!
YO! is a collection of short pieces by the writers at Youth Outlook!
[ filed under: youth philosophy ]  Knowing that 50% of marriages end in divorce definitely turns me off of marriage, considering I’m already somewhat opposed to the idea. It doesn’t make me want to avoid serious relationships though. Marriage and relationships have been around since human existence began and it’s nothing new. Yet, the way we portray relationships and carry them out have changed tremendously. I’m somewhat opposed to marriage because it is so traditional. You graduate high school go to college, graduate, get a job, marry buy a house and have 2 kids, all wrapped in a white picket fence. Marriage is just one of those things societies makes you believe you have to, or should do. So, you are 40, and single, you’re considered a failure or there is something wrong with you that repels someone from wanting to be with you. I don’t think there should have to be a label such as marriage on a relationship to make it last or to have it be real love. Along with marriage come wedding rings, one of the stupidest thing ever invented. Wedding rings just show how insecure someone is that they have to put a mark on someone to let everyone else know they are taken. If someone is really committed to someone else they don’t need a ring to show it. They also don’t need wedding papers to show they are in love. Someone can have a lifelong relationship with someone and actually be in love without getting married. Having wedding papers does give you more legal benefits. Marriage is such a permanent thing to me; your telling the person you will love them for the rest of your life. What happens when you find yourself losing the feelings you once had? I think there is a 50% divorce rate because people stop loving each other or they rushed into it. People change, and who says there is only one love of your life? Yet I think that if I did fall in love, I would possibly feel different about the topic of marriage. Possibly. Most of my friends disagree with me, my sister think I will change my mind. She is getting married in the fall, and I am really happy for her. I feel it’s the right thing for her and it makes sense. My sister’s relationship makes me think that maybe I would change my mind on getting married eventually. But as of right now… this is how I feel. comments |
|
For first time marriages the divorce rate is about 35 – 40%, and the rate second and third marriages is over 70%, when you lump them all together then you get that 50% number. Basically if you get divorced the first time you’ll probably get divorced again. So of the 100 couples who get married for the first time over 60 couples will be married until they die.
But there’s nothing wrong with tradition, but when was the last time you heard of a traditional courtship? A courtship would last a year or longer, was a public affair with a lot of input from others, and then there would be a formal announcement of the intent to marry, then finally a marriage. All in all this would take at least 3 to 4 years.
“Along with marriage come wedding rings,..”
No not really, they serve a purpose; it quickly lets another person know that you are married, it means that they shouldn’t expect that you to be available for marriage. Ask yourself this, at what point after you’re interested in a person do you ask if they are married? With a wedding ring you know what type of relationship to expect from the other person.
Do I need wedding papers, no, and yes you can have a lifelong relationship and love them forever and never get married. And yes there are some legal benefits from being married, not as many as people think, as well as a lot of responsibilities. But even if there wasn’t any legal benefit I would still get married in a church to show my commitment to my partner.
“What happens when you find yourself losing the feelings you once had? I think there is a 50% divorce rate…”
Every relationship changes, from the hot burning love to the comfortable type of love, but in a marriage as with any other type of relationship it takes a lot of work, I don’t think people lose the feeling; they just stop working on their relationship. They get lazy, they assume they don’t have to work at their relationship and are surprised when they find they have drifted apart.
By richard · Posted on Apr 17, 09:27 AM